3 days. It’s been three days since I returned back home after the experience in South Africa.
566 days. This is the number of days that separate me from my Erasmus in Riga.
And you know what ? Whether it’s 3 days or 566, I still miss people so much.
Certainly, at this moment I think of the people of South Africa.
I will not ask you to understand what I feel. I’m not going to ask you to put yourself in my shoes. I’m just going to try to put the words to express how I feel.
You have 6 weeks. 6 weeks with people you see h24 / 7d. You go alone to a country on the other side of the world and you meet people who are in the same situation as you. So you attach to them necessarily.
What you don’t realize is that you only have them. These people they become your family during the weeks abroad. They are always with you. If everything is fine they’re here to laugh with you. If it’s not they’re here to hug you. They laugh with you, eat, drink, cry, work … It’s crazy, these people, they’re still sticking to you. And you’re always sticking them. And shit, you love them! We met around a shabby table on the 7th floor in the middle of Maskavas Forštate to share a meal, or we have breakfast at the top of Table Moutain … Do you think there are better memories than that? Yes, to tell the truth, I made hundreds of wonderful memories.
And when you come back, you try to keep in touch, you try to tell you that you will see them again. But I have not seen any again (yet). I talk to them every day, because, you know, I have the impression that if I stop this contact, I lose a piece of myself. A Latvian or South African part of myself. It is an indelible mark on my little heart. It’s cliché and sounds a little stupid. Yet it’s screaming truth.
If you could understand how much I love these people.
Since 3 days it’s very hard. I will not lie to you.
I was told: « Léa calm down, you’ve known them for 6 weeks, you know nothing about their life, their past, it’s people passing through, you’ll forget them. »
Excuse me Honey, you’ve never been so wrong. They don’t know anything about my story either, you know? Apart from what I want to tell them. And you know what ? We don’t care not know the past of someone. In any case, the person you are today is what matters. Do you know what’s magic with these experiences? You can be yourself without anyone judging, or bring back your past with “shovel in your teeth” (French idiom that I love !).
So, yes, I love you. With all my heart to have been with you for years, to be with you on Bordeaux, to take coffee, glasses, meals, to share for months with you, to go on vacation with you, go to class with you, make music with you, go to work with you. But do you really want to compare friendships? Do you want to be jealous? « But it was only 6 weeks. » Fudge you.
And these are 6 weeks when you can be totally yourself. Do you know how enjoyable this situation is?
But do you really understand the situation?
You know the people you meet, they shape your experience abroad. These people, they open your mind, teach you hundreds of things, we discover together, we travel, we share so much. And then, leaving like this, it is also a rather complicated personal challenge. You have to give up a part of yourself, let your guard down. You know what ? You learn so much to know you. (I never said it was not terrifying).
But this fear is so insignificant compared to all the joy of these experiences.
So babe, take your courage with both hands, go, live an unforgettable experience, forge yourself abroad. And come back. And you will tell me if it is only « 6 weeks in a life, with 6-weeks-friendships we ended up forgetting ».
You know what ? I will continue to travel, to meet again beautiful people, whether they are Swiss, Spanish, Italian, Turkish, Saudi, German, French, Brazilian, Russian, Dutch, Latvian, Czech, and all the other countries of the world. And I will continue to drink around a table with them, to share a different culture, a different religion, a different thought. And I will continue to love the human that I meet. And I will always find the good sides of a person. And I will always love someone for who he is even if I do not know his past. And I know this meeting is not a coincidence.
I miss you my Love.